Transformers Fanfics, Essays, Author Interviews and More...! Established 1996!
Having seen "Bonnie and Clyde" with Warren Beatty and Faye Dunaway on TV recently, I thought this was a fine TF version with a little "Romero and Juliet" thrown in. Can't wait for your follow up. :-)
Hmm...quite good! Crossdive and Byway were developed very well. At no point did I see either slipping into the typical Mary Sue/Gary Stu roles that so plague fanfiction today. The build up of the relationship was rather well done as well, not to mention tons of witty dialogue and fascinating plot twists to keep the story moving.
My one objection? Elita-1's portrayal. She's a little too cold towards Byway. Rage at the Decepticons and a general hatred? Yeah, that I can understand, but her not knowing Byway's name just doesn't make sense, nor does her lack of caring for Byway's personal problems.
It just doesn't fit with the way her character's portrayed in "The Search for Alpha Trion." In that episode, she's shown as a relatively level-headed commander in an uphill battle for survival--what's more is that she values the life of her colleagues more than she does a mission success. Just look at their first words Elita-1 knows that their battle is nigh futile, so her troops safe-keeping is more important to her. The females in general come off as a pretty tight woven group. They'd have to be--all they really have is each other. Just watch her dialogue as they first enter. They comment on a mission gone wrong, but she brushes this aside and simply says she's glad their okay.
To me, someone whose style of commanding focuses more on each of the individuals screams of someone who would know her troops well, so I have trouble swallowing some of what happens here...
But otherwise, great story, can't wait to see the sequel! I can put up with a different portrayal of Elita-1 as long as the story's otherwise well written...and you did show her regrets, so more than decent job. ^_~ Keep writing, chica.